Divorce is going to be stressful but with the right divorce attorney, you can start to heal almost immediately. Losing massive amounts of property due to representing yourself will make it far more difficult to cope with. Coping in unhealthy ways might appeal to you but you are starting a new life! Taking care of your mental health during this time of transition cannot be stressed enough. Be proactive about coping as sitting around thinking about the divorce or old times will get you nowhere. One aspect to remember is that no great marriage ends in divorce which you can take solace in. The following are tips to help you cope with a divorce in a mentally healthy way.
Talk About Your Feelings
Bottling up your feelings and never acknowledging the divorce will make it tough to get over efficiently. Grieving the relationship even if you were the one that filed for divorce is natural. You lost a significant other and companion that you could have had for decades. Friends or family can be a great option as they will have an outside opinion about the marriage. If you are uncomfortable or have shared friends, then reach out to a mental health professional. You do not want your previous relationship to impact potential future relationships. There is a chance that the marriage was over before the divorce even crossed your mind. If you are in this situation, you might have already dealt with your feelings and are ready to move on.
Avoid Coping with Alcohol or Drugs
Far too many people cope with alcohol which simply just slows the recovery time after a divorce. Alcohol will not allow you to face your true feelings so you are just putting off coping with the divorce. Drugs are another way that people commonly use to deaden their feelings. Substance abuse, in general, should not be your way to cope. The last thing you want is to form an addiction as your ex will likely hear about it. You do not want them thinking you cannot live without them which can provide a spiteful ex with satisfaction.
Use Exercise as a Form of Stress Relief
Getting fit is far easier when you are single as you most likely will have extra free time. Getting into a routine of going to the gym can allow you to deal with the stress in a healthy way. Times of transition do cause stress for those that do not like change so put yourself on an exercise regimen. The tough aspect might be finding a type of exercise that you truly enjoy. Playing in an adult sports league can allow you to exercise while feeding your competitive fire. Investing in a stationary bike that you can ride while watching TV or in the morning with a cup of coffee provides a convenient way to get in shape from home.
Find a Hobby You Truly Enjoy
There is a chance that your ex didn’t like a hobby that you really enjoyed. You can now get back into that hobby whether it is fishing or playing trivia at a local bar/restaurant. Now is the time to enjoy yourself as you have nobody holding you back from trying new things. For those in warmer climates, kayaking can be a relaxing way to enjoy nature while getting a great workout. You might not find something you enjoy right off of the bat so this might be more of a trial and error period.
Divorce is never going to be easy but you can reinvent yourself during this time. Thriving is the best way to “win” a divorce as ultimately you just want to be happy.