- What’s your greatest fear about settling down with someone?
- Which couple in your life is the best example for the type of marriage that you want to have?
- How do you say you’re sorry?
- Is there something specific you need to hear or see when your partner is saying sorry to you?
- What’s the most important thing you need your partner to do in order for you to feel respected and listened to?
- What’s the number one nonverbal thing you do to show your partner that you love them?
- What do you think you’ll do if or when your marriage reaches a temporary lull?
- What is the worst thing someone could possibly say when they’re fighting with you?
- What is the worst thing someone could possibly do when they’re fighting with you?
- What’s the most important thing for you when it comes to making your relationship feel new and exciting every day?
- What do you think is the most harmful thing to a marriage?
- How did (and does) your family deal with conflict? Passive aggression? Open communication? Yelling? Sweeping it under the rug? Arguing calmly?
- And how does that affect the way you handle conflict today?
- Do you express your feelings more easily through actions or words?
- What is your love language? Basically, do you express and experience your love through giving and receiving gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of devotion, or physical touch?
- What do you think is the difference between unhealthy fighting and healthy fighting?
- If your marriage and/or future family is the most important thing in your life, what do you think are your second and third priorities?
- What do you need to still feel independent and in tune with yourself throughout your marriage?
- How important is religion to you?
- If religion is unimportant to you but important to your partner, are you willing to adapt?
- What’s your greatest vice when it comes to spending money?
- How do you feel about ‘alone time,’ and how much of it do you need each day to feel recharged?
- If your marriage is a strong focus on give and take, what are the things that you absolutely despise doing and that you would love for your partner to do? (Taxes? Changing diapers? Cooking?)
- And what are the tedious and unappealing things you’d be willing and happy to do so that your partner wouldn’t have to? (Grocery shopping? Paying the bills? Cleaning the bathroom?)
- What is the most amount of money you’re willing to spend on the various purchases that couples make together? A house, a car, home remodeling, vacations, etc?
- What is the biggest trigger that leads to trust issues in a relationship for you?
- What do you think is the healthiest way to go about making holiday plans (aka how will you decide between spending it with your partner’s family or your own?)
- Where do you see yourself in ten years, and how does your partner factor into that?
- What are your greatest pet peeves in a partner, and what would you do if your spouse was a perpetrator?
- Do you want kids, and is it nonnegotiable one way or another?
- If yes, what sorts of values and morals are most important for you to instill in your children?
- Would you ever go to marriage counseling if your relationship was in trouble?
- What specifically would it take to get you to go to a marriage counselor?
- What would you do if the sexual attraction between you and your partner had severely decreased?
- Do you think a relationship can ever come back from infidelity?
- What would happen if you and your partner disagreed politically? Is that a major concern for you?
- What is your ultimate idea of leisure, and where does your partner factor into that? Does leisure time need to be spent together or can it be spent alone?
- What is the number one thing you need on a bad day?
- What is the thing you look forward to the most about marriage?
- What is the thing you look forward to least about marriage?
- How do you decide when to take the advice of your partner and when to take the advice of your friends or family?
- What kind of energy do you want your home to have – cozy, bright, modern, warm, trendy, spotless?
- Should partners in a relationship share any and all money, or have separate bank accounts too?
- Would you mind moving if your partner had to relocate for a job, and would you want them to do the same for you?
- What happens if one, or both, spouses gain a significant amount of weight? Does it change anything?
- Can some friends be kept separate, or would you prefer a marriage where all the friends are mutual?
- How important is it to you to give some of your time or money to those in need?
- When is it okay to do something without talking to your partner first?
- What are the things that you think must be kept absolutely private to everyone else, only discussed between you and your significant other?
- Besides ‘I love you,’ what is the most important thing that needs to be said in a relationship?
See more questions to ask a girl on thoughtcatalog.com